Ephrem was one of those saints who spent his time being as poor as possible, beating himself up for the least slips in observing his religious duties, and chiding others about what was wrong with their lives–while being lauded for his meekness, humility, and righteous example. Blecch. For his ultra-goodness, he was named Doctor of the Church.
But in all of this piety, there is one wonderful story from late in his life, an event that affected him deeply and that gave him cause to reflect on himself. He was walking along a road, entering the town of Edessa, when a prostitute caught and held his gaze. Well, after all, it was her business and he was a visitor to the city!
The saint was appalled. This was not only a woman who dared to meet his gaze directly, but.. but.. but… one of those kinds of women! Butler refers to her as a “courtezan” which is simply a rather fancy way of saying “whore.” When this woman’s gaze did not falter, Ephrem asked her (was he really that naive?), “Why dost thou gaze upon me?” What is great is her answer to him: “Woman was formed from man; but you ought always to keep your eyes cast down on the earth, out of which man was framed!”
So this courtezan turned the holy man’s holy texts and holy actions inside-out! He wanted to know by what “right” she gazed upon him and she, in what I can only imagine was proud meekness (think of humble bragging), replied that “as a mere woman, made from man, of course I should look at men–my question is why you’re looking at me, instead of the ground?!” It was a combination of:
- “Shouldn’t you be minding your own business?”
- “Surely we both know why I’m looking at you!”
- “If you so disapprove of me and my profession, why do you keep looking at me?” and
- “Look, just because I’m a whore doesn’t mean I’ve never been to one of your churches!”
What a great reply, so cooly wrapped up in an unassailable packet for Ephrem’s consumption! And what timely words for a church that would continue to devote any of its time separating those who are worthy from those who are not, a church obsessed with sex, a church filled still with sexism and privilege, a church that makes a huge mistake when it thinks it has the corner on the use and interpretation of any texts in its keeping.
I like to imagine how this might have affected Ephrem going forward. Whatever the case, it truly is a Wrong Thing that the histories preserve only his and not her name!