Equitius was a self-appointed Sex Policeman. And, for this, he was made a saint.

In his youth, Butler reports, Equitius “was molested with violent temptations of the flesh, to which he opposed austerities and continual prayer: and at length God was pleased entirely to free him from the stings of that domestic enemy.”

Being victorious over lust, Equitius then took to the countryside to exhort other males to similarly dedicate themselves–turning from such violent temptations and, instead, devoting themselves to the service of God (?!). Because he was so successful, people began murmuring that Equitius was trying to act like a priest without having ever been ordained (heaven forfend!). This controversy reached the ears of the pope, who, as Butler writes, “after being fully informed, forbad him to be interrupted in giving private exhortations, an office of charity, in which the Holy Ghost seemed to be his master.” One of Equitius’ crowning achievements was when he took charge “of a numerous monastery of holy virgins, but never allowed any young monks to come near it.”

Thanks to that papal imprimatur, Equitius was given free reign to go from person to person, telling them–in essence–to stop being sexual beings and to start being Christians. What?! Why?!! Why has sexuality been set at odds with Christianity? Why haven’t churches instead been proactively supporting people in discovering and expressing their sexuality? Church silence about sexuality and the refusal (and not merely the failure) to embrace the sexuality of all human beings, coupled with innumerable sorties denouncing and damning those forms of sexual expression churches have particularly found objectionable, have led to countless incidents of mental illness, abuse of others and abuse of selves, lives lived in the shadows, crimes committed, and lives lost. And God is served…how?

No. Just No. Equitius may have been canonized but most certainly does not merit emulation.